A MESSAGE OF SPECIAL NEED MOM TO OTHER SPECIAL NEED CHILDREN MOTHERS
After the wait of 38 weeks, high blood pressure, sleepless nights, washroom sessions after every ten minutes, beside all this things lot of wait, lot of excitement and lot of love and from last 8 hours of labor. Every parent wants that doctor come to us and gives us good news and many of us get as well. But for us it was little different because Allah has blessed with a daughter with Down syndrome.
At that time we were unaware of this fact that what is a Mongolian child or what is special need child is. After a long struggle and lot of fears we came back home. And with two kids and third special need child life was not quite easy at all. Many people around us showed their sympathy in this way that God should take away this blessing from us but as much time I use to see my daughter face I was in love with her. Because that 2 days girl was in my womb for last 266 days, I was in love with her even when I haven’t seen her.
Lot of struggles, with her in initial years lot of care after 2 years we realized that she is the whole world to us. We smile due to her. She is the star of our eyes. What she wants from us is just Love. A long story cutted into short some important point which parents who have special child need to understand.
“ALWAYS EMBRACE THE UNIQUE WAY YOUR CHILD IS BLOOMING, EVEN IF ITS NOT IN THE SAME GARDEN YOU IMAGINED.”
- You are not alone in this journey. There are many people in this world who are in the same board. So no need to panic yourself.
As we are in modern era and we have access to social media you can read and know a lot about your special child kid needs. You can read success stories and even how to take care of them.
- You should also take care of yourself. Life doesn’t end over here. In initial years it can be difficult but very soon it will get settle. You also need friends, you also need to be socialized and you also need a pedicure or manicure session. So don’t forget yourself in all this.
- Try to celebrate little things around you. Be happy be patient. Laugh and celebrate small moments in life because it’s your life you have to decide whether you are going to accept this situation or not.
- Don’t let other parents show you down. It’s ok if their child starts walking in 4 months, or start speaking in 8 months. Remember each and everything need time. Its ok your child will learn slowly and gradually. Your child is amazing too he just need some time so just turn the deaf year to those parents and chill.
- Consider yourself a marathon player, you know the runner in marathon eat, drink, pee during running. The player who comes last is the person who took break, or stopped and took rest. So being the marathon runner you have to consider yourself in a roller coaster, where jumps are going to come but you have to stuck and be constant.
- Parenting is a very tough job but parenting of special need kid is dam hard. So be patient and trust god. And be constant and you will get the reward.
- Its ok if you make mistakes. You are human and humans are not perfect. Nobody around is perfect and don’t give sympathy to yourself. Everybody make mistakes and as you do too. So don’t be ashamed of it.
- Don’t compare yourself to others and nor your child with other kids at daycare or preschool. Remember every child if he normal or special need, is a different from each other they will give response according to their scenarios. Remember your child is unique and he has its own strength and success.
These are the few tips which I can give to those parents who are dealing with special need child. Remember my dear friends, it’s a journey between you and your child you have to make efforts nobody else will make and do whatever you want to do. Don’t listen to others whom you thing are letting you down and never compare your child and yourself with other because everybody has his own life and for anybody else life we have to walk in their shoes to know about their struggles.
A poem which I love the most.
You weren’t like other children,
And God was well aware
You’d need a caring family
… With love enough to share
And so He sent you to us
And much to our surprise
You haven’t being a challenge
But a blessing in disguise
Your wining smiles and laughter
The pleasure you impart
We are proud we have been chosen
To help you learn and grow
The joy that you have brought us
Is more than you know?
A precious gift from heaven
A treasure from above
A child who taught us many things
But most of all REAL LOVE”